Father of the Bride
[Editor's Note: Duke filed this on Friday but didn't make the deadline for Today in Fundraising — for good reason! I'm making note of it so the time references make sense. Congratulations to you and your family, Duke! Bright blessings to all. — MBG]
For the first and only time in my life, I will be the father of the bride this weekend. I have two children. My son was married 11 years ago to my wonderful daughter-in-law. My daughter's big day is tomorrow.
I laughed at Steve Martin when he was the father of the bride in the movies. I am not laughing this weekend. Being a father of the bride brings a range of emotions into play. I am happy for my daughter and thrilled that she will be joining a new family that she loves.
She has dated my new son-in-law for several years and attends dinners at her future in-laws house almost every Sunday. I'm a little sad as I realize time marches on — whether you like it or not. My daughter has grown into a beautiful young woman. I have been blessed with my own bride of many years. She is my first and only trophy wife. We are both from West Virginia and come from great families. I believe we have set an example of what makes a strong marriage work.
What does this have to do with philanthropy? We educate individuals in this profession on a daily basis. That said, I have never read one article about what families of development professionals experience. Their love, sacrifice and dedication are amazing. A typical development professional is away from home on nights, weekends and even days off. It is expected in their roles. Last week, I had to work on a "day off" plus a Saturday and missed being with my family on a weekend.
I love the work but had to leave my wife to do something else on a Saturday. In addition, how many times have you taken your spouse to a "work" event? My wife can write a book about her role in supporting me. I never asked her if she wanted to go. She knew she had to support the development guy doing his "thing" for the many organizations he has served. I deeply appreciate this unspoken support. She must love chicken dinners! Have you said thanks to your family?
When my daughter was 9, she told me she knew what I did for a living — she said I was Robin Hood, taking from the rich and giving to the poor. I tried throughout my career to take my children and family to activities related to charitable causes so they could learn about philanthropy and experience helping others. They understand it is always better to give than to receive. That's why I love our profession. We walk the walk.
We learn by doing, and teaching charity is so important in our community. My daughter is one of the most caring people I know. She has always given to others without expectation of return. She knows that giving of herself takes a great deal of energy and emotion. I have seen her tired but happy. I especially loved when she would work with me at our annual church festival.
I look forward to her wedding and welcome my new son-in-law with open arms. I also know my daughter will show the spirit of philanthropy to her new family and that feeling will spread throughout the coming years. I cannot wait to walk her down the aisle!
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- Fundraiser Education
Duke Haddad, Ed.D., CFRE, is currently the divisional associate executive director of development for The Salvation Army Indiana Division. He specializes in corporate development and capital campaigns. When time allows, he serves as president of Duke Haddad and Associates LLC and as a freelance educator for various educational entities.
He has contributed more than 600 articles to NonProfit PRO since 2008.
He earned his doctorate degree from West Virginia University, with an emphasis in education administration and a dissertation on donor characteristics. He also holds a master’s degree from Marshall University, with an emphasis on public administration and a thesis on annual fund program analysis. He received his bachelor’s degree, cum laude, in marketing and management from West Virginia University.
Duke has received the Fundraising Executive of the Year Award from the Association of Fundraising Professionals Indiana Chapter. He also has been honored with the Outstanding West Virginian Award, the Kentucky Colonel Award, and theSagamore of the Wabash Award from the governors of West Virginia, Kentucky, and Indiana, respectively, for his many career contributions to the field of philanthropy. He has been an AFP member for more than 40 years and has held the Certified Fund Executive (CFRE) designation for more than 30 years.
This year, Duke was named to Marquis Who’s Who in America for 2026-2027 and as an International CFRE Ambassador. He also recently published the book, "Prescriptions Rx for Nonprofit Success," which features more than 30 previously published articles, including several from NonProfit PRO.
