Living Your Eulogy Values

My job is to get people to ask other people for donations.

I spend silly amounts of time thinking about how to do that—what internal levers there are to pull, how to maneuver people into physical situations that bring about mental compliance, how to achieve a change in my targets’ willingness to do as I wish.

I believe that my youth as the second oldest and only girl of four children may have made me deeply manipulative and fairly skilled at hand-to-hand combat. In spite of my bent toward coercion, I feel good about what I do. And David Brooks in his “Moral Bucket List” piece helps me understand why.

Brooks says, “It occurred to me that there were two sets of virtues, the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues. The résumé virtues are the skills you bring to the marketplace. The eulogy virtues are the ones that are talked about at your funeral—whether you were kind, brave, honest or faithful. Were you capable of deep love?”

The best nonprofit points-of-contact with volunteers generally, or volunteer fundraisers specifically, reinforce the idea in that person that they are good. The best points-of-contacts help people identify with the idea that they are the person who runs into, and not out of, the burning building. If successful, we help our targets self-identify as being good to the point that they work for free for our nonprofits, donate to our nonprofits and fundraise for our nonprofits. We know, statistically, that positive communications work best on every front in gaining compliance. Those positive communications help people see themselves as helpers to others.

What we can feel great about, as we coerce people with positive messages to do the right thing, is that we are building out great eulogies each and every day. We are helping people be good.

Otis Fulton, Ph.D.

Otis Fulton, Ph.D., spent most of his career in the education industry, working at the psychometric research and development firm MetaMetrics Inc., Pearson Education and others. Since 2013, he has focused on the nonprofit sector, applying psychology to fundraising and donor behavior at TurnkeyHe is the co-author of the 2017 book, ”Dollar Dash: The Behavioral Economics of Peer-to-Peer Fundraising,” and the 2023 book, "Social Fundraising: Mining the New Peer-to-Peer Landscape,"  and is a frequent speaker at national nonprofit conferences. With Katrina VanHuss, he co-authors a blog at NonProfit PRO, “Peeling the Onion,” on the intersection of psychology and philanthropy.

Otis is a much sought-after copywriter for nonprofit fundraising messages. He has written campaigns for UNICEF, St. Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital, March of Dimes, Susan G. Komen, the USO and dozens of other organizations. He has a Ph.D. in social psychology from Virginia Commonwealth University and a Bachelor of Arts from the University of Virginia, where he also played on UVA’s first ACC champion basketball team.

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